JOINT BASE SAN ANONTIO-LACKLAND, Texas –
Laughter was the hardest ability to re-learn after tragedy for retired Navy Petty Officer 3rd Class Dave Roever,a resiliency coach who spoke at the National Prayer Breakfast here Feb. 7, 2017.
In July 1969, Roever was eight months into a deployment in Vietnam as a river boat gunner in the Elite Brown Water Black Beret when a phosphorous grenade exploded in his hand, dealing him massive, disfiguring injuries to his face and hands. After the extensive surgeries and rehabilitation that followed, Roever told his audience most people in his situation wouldn’t be in a laughing mood.
“But now, humor is the best medicine,” he said. “Laughter and joy push back my pain, back my hurt, and I don’t even recognize it anymore.”
Roever’s speech, which detailed how he came to terms with his disfigurement, found a new strength in his fellow Vietnam veterans and his Christian faith, and eventually ending up as a successful motivational speaker, was an emotional journey that captivated the audience.
“Leading isn’t pushing. You have to do it by example,” Roever said. “If I can inspire leaders to inspire their followers – by not taking themselves too seriously – it’s a balancing act, I hope that came through today.”
Roever, who moved around the room during his speech, personally engaged different members of the audience, which included Brig. Gen. Heather Pringle, 502nd Air Base Wing and Joint Base San Antonio commander; Lt. Col. Peter Fischer, 502nd Air Base Wing deputy chaplain; and several representatives from JBSA-Randolph and JBSA-Fort Sam Houston.
“I’m pretty speechless,” Pringle said of the experience. “What do you say for a message that is timeless – one that spans the reach of all the ranks?”
While Pringle noted the audience for Roever’s speech was primarily made up of senior military leadership, civilian directors and several distinguished guests, she encouraged these leaders to spread Roever’s words of resiliency.
“This could reach E-1 to O-9,” she added, speaking directly to Roever. “Your message is a true example to us all. What most of us face every day is nothing like what you went through, but we’ll remember your words.”
A memorable point in Roever’s story detailed how survivors of trauma can always find a silver lining.
“The blast from the grenade that hit me had blown my face off, my fingers were dangling, one of my arteries was open and I was about to bleed to death,” he recalled. “But the resulting fire from the grenade actually cauterized the opening of that artery. That’s why I survived at all. That was bizarre.”
In the speech, Roever made special mention of his family – his wife, Brenda; his two children; and four grandchildren as pillars in his recovery and his current happiness.
“They give me strength; they believe in me,” he said.
Roever’s story culminated in his first major speaking event at an officers’ conference in Europe more than 30 years ago. At the event, Roever was hesitant to push through the crowd of service members to take his place at the podium.
Roever broke through the crowd thanks to a strong push from Brenda, he recalled with a dash of dark humor.
“She told me, ‘Dave, you’ve got one ear and one nostril, this crowd will part for you,’ and sure enough, they did,” Roever laughed. “I felt like Moses (at the Red Sea).”
Fischer, who met Roever at that conference while serving in the Army, said he was delighted to hear the retired river boat gunner’s wisecracks and wisdom once again.
“He’s a phenomenal speaker,” Fischer said. “The crux of his message is, ‘if I can thrive through difficult circumstances, you can get through basic training.’”
Fischer noted prior to the National Prayer Breakfast, Roever made trips to multiple worship services on the base, and spoke to basic military trainees at Gateway Chapel here as well as medical-hold trainees who couldn’t attend.
Roever also provided a private counseling session for an employee with a terminally-ill spouse.
“Here’s a fellow service member who survived excruciatingly difficult circumstances,” Fischer said. “People can relate to that – they can see (their own) path forward thanks to him.”
The packed schedule was no trouble for Roever, who visits JBSA-Lackland several times for speaking events and tours, and is booked each week for the next two years, according to his foundation website, http://roeverfoundation.org.
“Lackland . . . I love this place,” Roever quipped. “Let me tell you, every chance I get to return here, I take it.”
When asked if he has any plans to return in the future, Roever put on his best Arnold Schwarzenegger Terminator impression.
“I’ll be back,” he deadpanned.